Dear Past Me,
First of all, how dare you?
Please do not feed me any rubbish about being unaware of what the schedule you set for me looked like. We all know what you did. You were optimistic about your emotional energy the very same year you began with a mental health episode. You weren’t even just optimistic considering your recovery. Oh noooooo. You were even optimistic for the rare unicorn that is Radiant Me (who comes out once every seven years when the planets align).
Time might be a construct, but thanks to time I can’t feasibly communicate any of this to you, Past Me, so I don’t even know what I’m doing here. Typing into the void?? Giving Future Me a head’s up to not be a hecking jerk to Future-Future Me? We all know Future Me is an optimistic try-hard, so what’s the point?
Don’t you know that you should set aside a spare moment to breathe after a whirlwind of networking? Possibly have a post set up to go within a week so people interested in your writing can see something new? Perhaps possibly maybe don’t have two programs scheduled (with no prep, thankyouverymuch) immediately after and no weekend days off?!? Why? Why are you like this?
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to make things more difficult for Future Me.